SATIRE: How to come across as urban, classy, refined, English-educated and well-grounded with the Indian way of life. Also be identified as an Intellectual.
Iâve been rummaging my motherâs wardrobe for hours in search of a blouse to go with my Fabindia Kota saree. I need the two to be glaringly mismatched, like that Carnatic singer-cum-mini celebrity on my Instagram feed. My mother doesnât seem to get the idea though.
My initial impression on Fabindia was made when at a literature fest in Delhi, I saw their brand worn by seemingly well-read women and girls ladies. I knew I was moved for life as I watched similarly dressed others on national television express vocally their critique/opinions on issues of the nation-state.
Thatâs when I decided I too would paint my life not with H&M or colors of Benetton. I was ready to embrace the Fabindia life â not only elegant, in vogue (and ridiculously overpriced) but also a sign of brains, wisdom and good taste. I mean, sure you’ve to wash them separately in shampoo but I donât mind as long as I distinguish myself as an intellectual. The JNU kind.
The sari of course must be draped carefully to look careless enough. That somehow lets everyone know I stand for Indian culture and ethnic produce. And my solidarity with impoverished artisans.
All those ajrakh prints in indigo and maroon that are expensive enough to kill, but worth it because they announce my elite upper class or at least upper middle class status. Urban, classy, refined, English-educated and well-grounded with the Indian way of life. (Because I have an enriched vocabulary with phrases such as impoverished artisans etc).
To be worn with mismatched blouses â not because I canât afford to match them (are you kidding me?) but because thatâs the brand.
You know, that Fabindia look.
The stuff goes great with shades so I can step in and out of my (armchair) liberal look whenever I want to. You can stop judging me, at least I care about equality. And human rights.
Also, I paid for this shit.
I mean, this isnât your 200/- kurta that was bought on a bargain off the streets, this was available only in 4 sizes catering to international standards, the smallest size available was still GIGANTIC for the native me to fit into but I still took it. I deserve some respect.
Itâs almost sad how some alter them though â hand them over to tailors seated behind rusted sewing machines. If all you wanted was for the clothing to fit, you might as well have shopped at Max. But of course I support individual’s right to choices (now that I don my liberal attire). One should shop wherever they want to.
My Fabindia style was also inspired by a certain left-leaning uncle, who happens to be a women-empowerment evangelist. Back in the day he had my aunt quit her job to feed his insatiable stomach three times a day. I mean, food is important you know? Fabindia hangs loose and comfy against his throbbing skin on blood that’s boiling for (other) women’s rights.
I havenât been to Sarojini Nagar since I got my first fat paycheck â the chaotic air and the crowd slathering their sweaty bodies against mine isnât worth it, I realized. Again, I’m too busy attending the meet-up/litfests I mentioned before. Now I’m one of them.
Although I admit I have heard awful things being accused of the Fabindian style â ânot everybody can afford itâ. But come on itâs affordable for almost all, I cry.
All except the impoverished artisans. And you.
I mean if everyone could afford it, I would go unnoticed in a sea of kalamkari weaves and ajrakh prints – that isn’t the status symbol I pay for. I seem to have mentioned classy, make that class-marker, shall we.
The other day, an ambitious junior walked into my cubicle while I was browsing through the website catalog on my PC. âThat seems like a reasonable price for a Fabindia kurta. I can finally afford one myselfâ, she seemed delighted.
âDearâ, I tell her, genuinely apologetic and squishing a fly that as its final bad decision landed on my 9k Kota sleeve. âThatâs the price of the dupatta the model’s wearing with the kurta, not the kurta itselfâ, I had to explain to the poor girl (no pun intended).
Thank god Fabindia upholds its values.
Hopefully she knows she can buy an entire wardrobe at Sarojini market for that money (make that four).
The dyes from both places are going to run out when you wash their clothes anyway.
I hit âpostâ on my new Instagram picture captioned âCouldnât find a blouse to match but this doesnât look too bad does it?â hashtag ethnic hashtag handloom hashtag Indian fashion.
Afterthought : I feel qualified enough now to add hashtag human rights. Another picture, maybe.
Trust Me, You're Alive 